I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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