so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
