did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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