My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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