8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
We're too hungover to prance.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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