So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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