I want to have your abortion
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
