dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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