i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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