that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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