Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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