Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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