physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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