we're blogging at a bar
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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