i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
