i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
