I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
When did angry sex become our thing?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
