No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
