my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I wish you could order shots online.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
