I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
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