im gay
i know
yea but for you.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
