we have pet lesbian snakes
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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