Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
