the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize