I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
