Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize