I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Randomize
