i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
