so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
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