Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize