the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
