i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
