i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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