i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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