Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Still dying that you shit outside
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize