i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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