you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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