Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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