I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
foreskin is a definite game changer
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize
