I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
