i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
