Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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