This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize