How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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