So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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