At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
