do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
