okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
