Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
So squirting runs in the family.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
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