Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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