Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
